I don't think brook has ever known best
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
