all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
