they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
