Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize