jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
She's the barista slut.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
