mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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