READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
