your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
