i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize
