Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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