Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Randomize
