Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
