If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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