You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
