Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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