This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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