We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
She's just so happy...and so naked.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
