Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
