i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
