The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
BRING THE BAGELS
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
