i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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