My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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