I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
