I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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