God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
