Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
