Whod you bang
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
This is classic penis vs brain.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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