yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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