Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
