im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
she woke up with a sticky ear
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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