had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
