pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
So many bounce houses so little time
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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