If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
