Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
