its not stalking. its research.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
