one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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