I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Randomize
