Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize