I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i was born a porn star she said
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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