Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
