In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
