U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Randomize
