There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
