no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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