i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
