We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize
