no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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