so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
i would one night stand the shit outta him
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
