Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize