Having a random hookup so left but love u
another moral hangover. fuck.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize