Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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